"Body Dismorphic Disorder" that’s the medical term for people who think they’re ugly but aren’t. I got a friend who suffers from this, she thinks her looks are repulsive, even comparing herself to the Elephant man and will constantly ask me if I think she’s ugly, she’s not, in fact she’s absolutely gorgeous but whenever something goes wrong like a boyfriend breaks up with her, an interviewer doesn’t give her a job, or whatever she blames it on being ugly. "Am I ugly?" she’ll ask me, "is that why he didn’t call?" This happens a lot and as always I tell her honestly, "no, your not, your unbelievably beautiful." But it’s no use as she doesn’t believe me or anyone else for that matter, yet she continues to ask which after a while gets... well... freakin downright annoying especially since whenever we’re out in public it’s HER that guys are checking out and doing a double take.
At first I thought she was conceited as every time we would walk past a surface with reflection like a tv screen, a window or someone's sunglasses, she couldn't fight the need to bend over and analyze every detail in her face, fix her hair– obsessively. But now I understand that a lot of people like this are suffering from low self esteem and were most likely raised to believe that about themselves but it’s sometime’s hard to keep that in mind when it feels as though your whole relationship is based on trying to be the self esteem the other person doesn’t have. Higher self esteem has to come from within, I know I have my own self esteem issues and it’s not like I walk around asking everyone if they’re going to stab me in the back. And besides asking constantly saying that your ugly around people is going to do one of four things, it’s either going to make people think that your fishing for compliments, wanting them to tell you how gorgeous you are, or your going to look self absorbed, as if nothing else is on your mind, or it’ll make people wonder how you view them, or they are eventually going to believe you.
I used to have another friend who whenever he would get drunk would ask everyone in ear shot if they thought he was good looking, we would all tell him that he was but he wouldn’t stop he would go on for half hour at a time completely killing our buzz. Soon this became a regular weekend activity as we would all go to the pub every Friday night. Eventually someone finally said to him, "look you think you are an ugly person, but you sure make one fine looking ogre", he got the hint after that. Anyway, if anyone has any advice on how to talk to my friend, it’d be greatly appreciated.